Thursday, 29 June 2017

Feeling Confused And Useless...


Today I have felt really down. I was talking on the phone doing something for my G/daughter Zoe and ? started to intimidate me saying I am useless and kept critacizing me in a menacing way, telling me that I can't do anything and making me feel guilty and inadequate as if I had done something wrong. He humiliated me while I was talking to the lady on the phone, she could hear all this and he also done it in front of my G/son Steven. He made me feel weak. I got back on the phone and did find out what I wanted to know for Zoe.

I felt so confused and in the end I did feel useless. I was shaking, felt so uneasy and upset and near to tears. 
? kept saying he could never be happy in this house around us. I said, go then, you won't be missed. I couldn't keep quite any longer. Of course he carried on putting me down, but I couldn't careless and held my head high in a snooty, arrogant way I suppose and let him see this and let him get on in his manipulative ways, but as soon as I said anything, it was twisted and it fell back on me as if I'm in the wrong. I didn't talk to him after that.
? is such an arrogant pig headed B*****d and thinks he is always right, Gods gift! pft!! yeah right! I have always said 'as long as ? is alright aye' I have told him this many a time and that is how he is day in and day out...B****y Sh***y PIG Faced B*****d!!! And, yes, I've called him that too, and more!!
Sometimes I just wish he would just go away and leave me a lone, but no he won't because he knows he can Manipulate, Intimidate and Patronize me and get away with it because he knows I don't know what to do about it because he can control me when ever he likes and that I don't know what to do about it. I hate him, I hate men for what they are. I think they are all pigs and that's being nice.


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